Linchpin
by Salazarfalcon
Summary: Kai likes to pretend that he doesn't have nightmares and at this point in his life, he's gotten pretty good at faking. Until he can't anymore. Somehow, he winds up with a human shield in the form of Rei Kon and he doesn't even know how it happened.


Linchpin

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><p>Disclaimer: Not a chance. I own nothing.<p>

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><p>Summary: Kai likes to pretend that he doesn't have nightmares and at this point in his life, he's gotten pretty good at faking. Until, of course, he can't anymore. Somehow, he winds up with a human shield in the form of Rei Kon and he doesn't even know how it happened.<p>

Tl;dr: This is really just an excuse to write angsty snugglefluff. Time-wise, I'm placing this after GRev.

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><p>AN: Okay, so this is my first Beyblade fic that isn't part of my R&amp;B-verse. Please don't hit me ahahahaha. Also, if you've never seen someone using <em>systema<em> (Russian martial art sometimes used by some units of Spetsnaz), look up some videos on youtube. It's kind of amazing.

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><p>Kai likes to pretend that he doesn't have nightmares and at this point in his life, he's gotten pretty good at faking.<p>

He tries, at first. He really tries to fix himself to a relatively normal sleeping schedule, if only to keep the team he only barely claims off of his back. It's one thing to have nightmares, quite another to have nightmares about things he _doesn't remember_, and that makes it infinitely worse.

Kai's not crazy, thank you.

He might not be crazy but waking up in a blind panic, shaking and breathless is not how he ever wants his team to see him. Oh, he doesn't like them but however he thinks, he's been put in charge of them. They're _his_ and they will absolutely not see him like this, weak and terrified and close to tears. Not ever, because that's not how a leader looks.

He'd rather be hated and feared than be pitied.

Eventually, he goes from trying (and failing) to sleep to grabbing it when he can and not bothering to try when he can't. The excuses to Mr. Dickinson come easily, if not the absolute tiniest bit guiltily.

_I'm a night person._

_I don't need a lot of sleep._

_It doesn't affect my performance, so leave me alone._

And it doesn't, not really. It makes him crankier, certainly, and testier about things that wouldn't piss him off as much as they do when he's perpetually exhausted, but Kai's efficient if nothing else. And he can't help but feel, even though he doesn't know how or why, that he's used to working harder than this on less rest and more pain.

The time from eleven to two is the easiest to manage because it's not so late that he really feels like he needs to sleep. It's easy to distract himself, to listen to music, to pace, to go for a long walk. There are still things to do and that takes the burn off and dulls the edge of the beginnings of anxiety curling up in his stomach.

If eleven to two is the easiest, then two to four is the worst. He's _so_ tired, but most of the time he knows that sleep won't be happening. The shadows seem darker and every sound and every movement make him jumpy and irritable because he doesn't know why he's so damned scared. It's easier to be angry than to show weakness, especially when the other members of his team are so close, sleeping deeply and easily as if they've never worried.

All Kai knows is that bad things happen when it gets dark.

Bad things _have_ happened.

To him.

He can't remember them but his body and mind know all too well, remember the pain, and won't let him settle.

Around four-thirty, Kai finally has to give up and lay down, taking the restless and too-few hours of sleep that mostly he spends tossing and turning and running from things he can't see but he _knows_. It's a relief when he wakes up even though the ache running through him goes straight to his bones.

Kai hadn't thought that it could really get worse, but it does.

By a landslide.

He _remembers_ now and while it's a relief to know that he's not crazy (yet, anyway), at least before he could stay relatively detached. Before, he could pass it off as just being a kid that got weird nightmares and forget about them.

Now he knows why exactly they've stayed with him, and now he has more to add to the stockpile.

To make it worse, he thinks that Rei's on to him.

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><p>"What are you still doing awake? It's really late."<p>

"Nothing. Go back to sleep."

"Are you okay?"

"Shut _up_ and go back to sleep."

For a while it works. At least a little bit. Rei doesn't say anything, but golden eyes follow him more than they used to, and every so often the other boy opens his mouth to start to say something before thinking better of it. Kai won't admit it but he's grateful for this, because he doesn't want to hear it. He _refuses_ to hear it and Rei knows it.

If it were Max or Takao, he'd never hear the end of it.

It's all getting worse, though.

Rei's worried and it shows because he's staying up later now too, watching Kai furtively through lowered lashes and side glances. Kai ignores him until he can't stand it, bright blood-red eyes glaring straight at the other boy as he angrily slides into bed, pulling the blanket up over his head. Everything goes heavy and Kai watches the clock the entire night, even after he knows that Rei's asleep.

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><p>"How the hell did you actually beat Tala? This is a disgrace."<p>

"What crawled up your butt and died? Quit being a jerk."

"Quit sucking and maybe I'd be able to."

His temper has been frayed for years from a steady three hours a night. It's ripped and torn to shreds from a night of none and it shows the next morning at practice. Takao's annoyed but also kind of hurt and later when he thinks about it, Kai feels bad about it. It's not that he finds the words particularly hurtful (and wouldn't a therapist have a lot to say about that?) but the kid didn't deserve them at the time and if he were anyone else, he'd take them back or at least apologize.

But he's not anyone else.

He's Hiwatari Kai and he can't because every time he so much as thinks the word _sorry_ he feels the frost of fear settle in his gut and remembers a large, unwanted hand sliding up his bare back.

Instead, he actively puts a leash on his mouth for the rest of the day even when their voices get too loud and make his head hurt. He resists the urge to snap at Max when he folds the take-out menu into a paper airplane and accidentally hits him in the head with it. He leaves the room and runs through a series of systema movements out in the yard when the world starts to get heavy again and only feels worse when he's done.

Rei watches him closely and he hates it.

For the second night in a row, Kai doesn't sleep.

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><p>He drags himself through practice by sheer force of will and Kai's quite sure that while he's been in more pain before, he's never felt worse. Going through the day feels like swimming through pudding and every bite of food tastes like sawdust and nothingness.<p>

He almost makes it. Almost.

He makes it up until two-thirteen that afternoon and takes the step that breaks everything.

His vision swims and suddenly the floor's coming up to meet him.

When Kai wakes up, it's dusk. He doesn't have to open his eyes to know where he is; the feeling of the couch cushion under his cheek is unmistakable, as is the scent of the blanket that's been draped over him. It's not his and he can't quite place it but it's still somehow familiar, reminding him of warm spices and something he can't name.

His head hurts like a _bitch_.

Apparently, Kai voices this out loud because whoever's sitting nearest to him (Rei, of course. It figures) starts and a hand settles at his temple, light and cool.

He can't make himself shake it off.

"Yeah, you're probably going to have a hell of a headache for a bit, you hit the ground pretty hard."

If Kai hadn't already been sure that he was dealing with Rei, the voice would have been a dead giveaway. Even if he hadn't known the voice, no one else would have spoken so calmly. In fact, he can hear Max frantically stage whispering from the other side of the room, and Rei shushes him. The hand just barely touching his face doesn't move.

"So what brought that on?" Rei's question is only half a question, laced with a demand like steel.

Kai opens his eyes briefly to scowl at him and doesn't answer.

Gold eyes sharpen and the boy continues, his voice deceptively pleasant and conversational. A deaf man would be wary and Kai's not stupid. If his head wasn't still filled with salt water, he might care a little more.

"I read something a few days back that you might find interesting," he says, "Apparently, a lack of sleep can lead to fainting spells. Not like you would have experienced any of those, would you?" Kai could have punched him. "And irritability and mood swings, can't forget that. And a lack of appetite." Rei's voice lowers. "I don't think I've ever been able to catch you sleeping. Care to share with the class?"

"Go to hell, Kon," he snarls, but raising his voice just makes his head throb and he half-cringes, burying his face in the cushion. There's a burning behind his eyes that is absolutely not the threat of tears. He won't let it be.

"You can't keep this up. I don't know why you're not sleeping but you're making yourself sick."

"Drop dead."

Kai drags in a shuddering breath and pulls the blanket closer to him and doesn't look at the expression on his teammate's face: frustrated and worried and _fearful_.

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><p>That night, Kai doesn't have much of a choice but to sleep.<p>

He's exhausted and Rei's been shadowing him all evening and all he wants to do is turn around and snap at him to _stop_ because it's driving him nuts and Kai doesn't need a babysitter. It's either be smothered by Rei or be perpetually orbited by either Max or Takao, though, and that would be even worse.

Reluctantly, he ignores the tightness in his chest and closes his eyes, nestling down into the pillow. Sleep comes all too easily.

When he wakes, it's two hours later and he's nearly concussed Rei in his confusion, lashing out with a fist and too incoherent to pull his punches.

"Holy crap, Kai," Rei's rubbing his jaw and it's _definitely_ going to bruise. He starts to say something else but stops because Kai isn't listening to him at all, curling in on himself and dropping his face into his hands. He's shaking helplessly and his breaths are coming quick and shallow and Rei's sure that if he was anyone other than Hiwatari Kai, he'd be crying.

Dropping the hand that's trying to soothe his aching jaw, Rei sidles closer to the other boy. It's kind of his own fault that he got hit, really. He's been rolled onto often enough by Gary to know what can happen when people sleep, he's just never known anyone who wakes with instinctive self-defense and he's never met anyone who can hit so _hard _without even aiming. He'd been woken up in the first place because he'd been worried and because no one having good dreams made the sounds that were coming from Kai when he slept.

His only mistake had been leaning over him when he tried to wake him up.

"Hey, hey, are you okay?" Rei tries, but Kai's not looking at him.

He's not looking at much of anything, really. Not unless his palms count.

Tentatively, Rei dares to reach out and brush a hand over Kai's bare shoulder, almost hoping to be swatted away or snapped at. Somehow, it's even worse when that _doesn't_ happen.

Of all the things that Rei had been expecting, this wasn't it. Kai was notoriously ambitious, he'd thought that he was working himself too hard or training too much late into the night. Yeah, he did all of those things.

But Rei always figured that it'd be because of pride and drive, not because of nightmares.

"Kai? How often do you get these?" he dares to ask. He doesn't honestly expect an answer.

"…every night," the other boy answers and Rei feels himself go slightly light-headed. Every night? _Every night_? Holy damn. Kai's bangs are darkened with sweat and Rei can't help but come closer, trying to peer into his face. Kai stubbornly turns his head away.

"Is there anything that helps? Anything at all?"

Rei isn't doing much, he's really not. He's kneeling next to his captain with his hand on his shoulder. He doesn't want to push him and he doesn't want to make him angry, even though lately it seems like angry's all he's been. How much of that was genuine and how much of it was stress, really? But he can't just leave this be. He just can't.

"No. Nothing. Nothing ever… nothing ever—" Kai's voice breaks.

And oh, _goddamnit_.

He's actually crying.

The tears are coming hot and fast, angry and sad and scared, and Kai's biting his lip so hard that it's bleeding. He doesn't make a single sound.

Inwardly, Rei's in a complete flutter even though it doesn't show on his face.

"H-hey, come on. Come on, don't cry. It's okay—"

"It's _not_ okay," Kai suddenly snarls in response, voice raw, "It's not okay at all! It's not okay, it's never _been_ okay, it'll never _be _okay! Shut up and quit pretending that you know any- a-anything…!"

Rei can't stand it anymore and leans in close, wrapping his arms around Kai and reeling him in before he can protest. For someone who's always been taller, stronger, bigger, and badder, Kai seems all too breakable. He feels cracked and barely held together right now and Rei feels like tape or caulk because Kai sags against him like he doesn't have a choice.

His hands clench in Rei's shirt and the other boy holds him tightly, getting off of his knees and settling to the floor. Unconsciously, he starts to rock, slowly swaying side-to-side. Kai's choking out sobs into his shoulder and practically vibrating with tension; whether this is an after-effect of the dream or because of Rei himself, he doesn't know.

"Shhh, shhh, calm down," he croons, not even taking note of the words coming out of his mouth. The words don't matter, he doesn't think Kai's even hearing him, but he forces himself to keep his voice low, tone quiet and firm and steady. Rei's done his share of comforting, but he never thought he'd be putting it to use with this. "It's going to be okay, you're not alone. It's okay, it's okay. You're safe here. I'll protect you. I will, I promise."

He'd never considered the possibility of nightmares and Rei could kick himself for it. He knew, _knew_ that no one in that abbey was treated well. He knew it. He could see it every time he looked Kai in the face or watched the way he moved, or noticed the way he and the Demolition Boys interacted with one another. They were rarely outwardly affectionate, almost always bickering about something or another or squabbling, but there was always something.

There was something in the way that they honed in on each other instantly, the same way that Kai had taken to doing with them. There was something in the way that they looked out for one another, watchful and protective, even though Kai and Tala were the only two out of the group that he'd ever seen so much as exchange a shoulder clap. There was something in the way that Kai seemed to go through life, stubborn and determined and fierce, that made Rei feel as if he was always just waiting for the other shoe to drop.

He probably was.

Kai's finally calming, his breath ragged.

Rei doesn't loosen his grip.

"I'm…I'm—crap. I didn't mean to do that," Kai's voice is muffled and he radiates embarrassment from the whole thing, "I don't know what came over me."

There are a lot of things Rei can say.

He can go with, _It's okay._ Stupid. It wasn't okay at all but probably not for the reasons Kai was thinking.

He can say _You probably needed it_ which, while probably not completely wrong might have been the worst thing he could do.

Or he can even forego words entirely and let him go. Back away and crawl back into his futon and pretend to forget the whole thing.

He doesn't do any of those things, choosing instead to adjust his hold on Kai to be more comfortable, running a hand up and down the other boy's spine. He waits for Kai to start to struggle because he's sure it's on the way, but it never comes.

Scarlet eyes are slightly dazed and Rei doesn't notice when his blinking slows and his breathing evens out. He doesn't notice until he looks down and realizes that the other boy hasn't so much as moved in minutes and has in fact fallen asleep completely.

Rei shrugs mentally and physically, shifting a bit so that he's leaning up against the wall for support. He adjusts Kai's legs so they're slung over his and there's no danger of dropping him by accident and reaches out to tug his blanket over.

It covers them easily.

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><p>When Rei wakes up, he's alone but the sun's up. The clock says nine and he wonders how the hell he hadn't been kicked awake at seven on the dot. In retrospect, he also wonders how he's avoided being killed for letting Kai treat him like a snuggle pillow but doesn't question it; he rather likes living, really.<p>

There isn't a peep coming from the room that the three younger boys share and Rei's astounded to realize that yeah, they're totally sleeping in too.

He checks the sky.

Yep, still blue.

A flash of color in the yard catches his eye and Rei pushes open the window to poke his head out. Kai's running through a series of martial arts movements that Rei doesn't recognize and for the first time in a long time, he looks relatively relaxed and his movements are fluid. His stance is strong and unlike yesterday, he doesn't look like he's going to collapse.

Good.

The Russian blader suddenly stops and red eyes meet gold.

Rei smiles and waves to him.

Kai goes pink (has Rei actually seen him _blush_ before? He thinks not. Has he ever considered the thought that Kai was capable of such a thing? Not in a million years.), ducks his head, and turns away from him.

Rei's jaw cracks and he flinches. That's going to be fun to explain away.

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><p>Kai doesn't remember the last time he slept so well or for so long. He doesn't remember the last time he's felt so legitimately <em>good<em>.

He knows better than to think it'll ever happen again.

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><p>Now that Rei kind of knows what to look for, it's easy to tell when Kai's subconscious goes downhill at night. The other boy falls asleep quickly so it's not hard to stay up, especially when Rei's gotten so damned good at faking falling asleep himself.<p>

Deep breathing goes quick and anxious and Rei hears the sound of blankets being kicked and struggled with.

He knows better than to loom over him this time and debates on whether to wake him again.

Finally, he drags his futon over and smoothes it out next to Kai's. Hoping that he would live to see morning, Rei lies down again and drapes an arm over his captain, bringing him in close. The effect is almost instantaneous.

It's like magic; Kai quiets and rolls over and Rei can just barely see his eyebrows unfurrow. Rei blinks and shifts when the other boy sidles closer and nestles his face in the crook of his neck. The dark hair at Kai's nape is softer than he'd thought it'd be and the warm breaths hitting his skin are less disconcerting than he would have imagined.

In fact, the whole situation is much less weird than it could have been, but Rei doesn't want to think about it too hard. If he does, it'll eventually come down to the fact that he's essentially snuggling the nightmares away from his captain, and that just sounds like the summary of a bad children's movie.

A set of ankles that don't belong to him tangle up with his and Rei drops his head against silky, two-toned hair.

It's easy to settle down to sleep again, shockingly so. Rei's used to sleeping near people but not _with_ people and the feeling of another body pressed up against his is new but not unwelcome. He doesn't know whether it's because he's inherently cuddly or if it's because it's Kai, and he _definitely_ doesn't want to think about that one too hard.

And when Rei wakes up the next morning (alone, but at seven on the dot for training), he can't help but feel that Kai isn't the only one benefiting from this arrangement.

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><p>Kai doesn't say a word about it and they're both kind of okay with that.<p>

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><p>It isn't until the twenty-third night that Rei screws up his courage and drops his futon on the floor next to Kai's with a resolute thud. Neither of them is even asleep yet and Rei waits, arms folded across his chest.<p>

Kai glances from the futon up to his teammate, then back to the bedding again.

Rei cocks his head, a single eyebrow raised in blatant challenge.

Scarlet eyes narrow.

Finally, Kai drags in a breath and shrugs determinedly. He's feigning calm (badly) but he'd be stupid to deny that he's been feeling better than he has in a long, long time, and it's been showing. Oh, he's not soft by any means but it's not so hard to keep his temper and he doesn't wake up in pain anymore. So far, though, neither he nor Rei have said anything to one another about the system they've had going.

Not a single acknowledgement.

Until now, anyway, and Rei's thrown the starting shot.

Now's the time for Kai to tell him to take that thing away, that he doesn't need some deranged dreamcatcher in the form of his most relatable teammate, that he doesn't need a security blanket. Except that…he kind of does. And it's obvious. He could break this so easily and a while ago, he would have in a second. Maybe half a second. No more than three seconds, tops.

Eight seconds pass, then ten, then twelve.

Seventeen go by, and he doesn't say a word.

Until finally, on the thirty-first,

"It's getting cooler, isn't it?"

Awkward, but normal conversation's always been hard for him; Kai's better at speaking with his body and his blade than his voice.

Kai doesn't think that anyone's eyes will ever glow as brightly as Rei's do just then.

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><p>Kai's surprised that it takes as long as it does for the other boys to catch on. Well, he is and he isn't, mostly because it's completely Rei's fault. Every single bit of it, and he will be holding that claim until the very end of his days, mark his words.<p>

On the fifty-third night there's a terrible thunderstorm and Max, notoriously anxious in those situations, knocks on the door.

Oh, he's looking for Rei because Kai's the one who gets all the hard stuff that requires brutal honesty and a kick in the pants; Rei's who they go to for reassurance and head pats. Like coffee and cream.

It really shouldn't have surprised Kai that Rei, despite being all cat-like reflexes and sneaking abilities, thinks nothing of extending a drowsy and half-asleep,

"Come in,"

Never mind the fact that he's kind of playing big spoon with Kai, who's about as cuddly on a good day as an icicle in the arctic.

And that's how Kai wakes up, sharply and unexpected, to the sound of a gasp and a dropped pillow. He blinks until the world comes back into focus, straight into startled blue eyes. He glares at Rei, who doesn't look nearly shamefaced enough for Kai's liking.

"Oh, uh…I'm sorry," Max stutters, "I didn't think…um. Sorry?"

Kai huffs and rolls his eyes before pulling the blanket up over his head, essentially burying himself.

"Oh, for the love of— I can't take this. Everything about you is terrible, Kon. Every. Single. Thing."

"Come on, don't be dramatic."

"Go to hell."

Rei runs a finger teasingly down Kai's side and receives an elbow in the gut in retaliation. Max looks like he's just realized that he took a wrong turn and ended up on Mars and Rei takes pity on him, absently patting the blanket where he's pretty sure Kai's head is. Thunder booms and the blonde boy cringes, sinking to the floor and clutching his pillow to his chest.

Luckily, Kai's probably embarrassed enough to suffer through about any indignity at this point as long as he doesn't have to show his face, Rei figures, and lifts up the edge of the blanket on his other side.

He pats the extra space on the end of his futon.

When Max crawls in next to him, Rei almost makes a sandwich joke. Almost.

It's so tempting, but he could swear that Kai has mind-reading powers because there's a hand tugging threateningly at the hem of his shirt and some jokes just aren't worth the payback.

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><p>The sixtieth night is the first that Kai's had to spend alone in what in reality isn't too long, and he's miserable. He can't sleep and the little he manages to catch is restless and plagued by nightmares. Eventually, he ends up going outside and walking aimlessly through town until he can see the first streaks of sunlight against the sky.<p>

The sixtieth night is the first that Rei's had to spend alone in what to him feels like forever, and he's not expecting the loneliness that catches him the moment the lights are off. Until then he's thought of it mostly as something primarily for Kai's well-being and peace of mind and not so much for his own. The shadows are darker and the noises are louder and there's nothing next to him to hold on to and he _hates_ it.

The sixty-first night is calm and quiet. They both pretend to fall asleep and for the first time, Kai's awake when he reaches out to twine an arm around Rei's waist and tug him close. His heartbeat thuds loudly in his ears, and he wonders just when he started fitting so well with him.

Rei's used to touching by now, but he can't resist ducking his head in to nuzzle his nose against the soft area just behind Kai's ear. It's something he's never dared to do before and he can't figure out why his hands are shaking when they never have before.

And Kai _burns_.

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><p>On the eighty-third night, Kai buries his hands in Rei's collar and pulls him in to press their lips together. He then proceeds to roll over and fall asleep.<p>

Rei, on the other hand, lies awake the whole night, face flushed and heart racing, a part of him unsure as to what the hell just happened.

The rest of him knows _exactly_ what happened and sings with a pure, foreign sort of joy.

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><p>On the eighty-fourth night, Rei kisses him back.<p>

* * *

><p>Two hundred and forty-one nights later, the system's only been broken three times even though everything's about to change.<p>

Max thinks it's _cute_ (Kai really, really wants to sneer at that but he's got a soft spot for Max) and Takao doesn't get it at all. Kenny keeps his thoughts to himself and Kai can't help but be grateful that _someone_ does, because it's not like anyone else is capable of keeping their opinions to themselves.

That includes Rei.

He also thinks they're cute, but he's biased.

Kai doesn't want to ask Rei what's going to happen now; Max's going back to the United States for six months and Takao's been talking for ages about how awesome it's going to be to get back to the dojo.

As an emancipated minor, Kai's got his options and his choices, but he doesn't want to make them without Rei.

He's almost too scared to ask, because he doesn't want to hear about how much he's been looking forward to getting back to China.

Kai leaves in the afternoon and doesn't come back until morning.

* * *

><p>"What are we doing?" Rei whispers into Kai's shoulder blade, "What's going to happen?"<p>

Kai can't help the full-body shudder that runs through him.

"I don't know," he finally replies, "I pick a place to live that doesn't make me want to kill myself with memories, and you… I guess you go back to China. Aren't you happy? You've missed your team."

He can't see Rei's face.

It's silent for a long time after that, until,

"I…guess I'm happy about that. I have missed them." The words come tentatively, as if Rei's not happy about it at all. But that can't possibly be right. "Do you know where you're going to be?"

Kai closes his eyes.

"I haven't picked, yet. Voltaire has property all over the world, and I still have to put back together everything he destroyed. I'll probably stay in Japan, though." Kai doesn't mention the court case against his grandfather that's going to get dropped on his head the minute he's back in the real world. It's been postponed long enough. He has to finish this and he has to see justice. He has to, even if he's afraid that it's going to destroy him in the process.

"Maybe I could…I could visit?" Rei suggests tentatively, and Kai feels his heart clench unhappily.

He doesn't want to think about Rei visiting. He doesn't want to think about him leaving. He doesn't want to think about training by himself without anyone to actually challenge him and he doesn't want to think about eating every meal alone. He doesn't want to think about waking up early and not having anyone to surprise with a gruffly offered bagel from the local bakery.

This is the closest he's ever been to happy in his life.

"If you ever wanted," Kai begins, words unsure, "If… if you ever wanted, it wouldn't have to be a visit. You could stay."

Rei freezes where he is, hands tucked up just under the hem of the tank top Kai prefers to sleep in when he wears a shirt at all. He feels like his brain's just stopped because they've always shied away from talking about something like this, about permanence, even though both of them consider their relationship the farthest thing from a joke or a triviality.

"Can I think about it?" he asks, finally. Kai doesn't answer him with words, choosing instead to brush a kiss over his cheek as if it's the last he'll ever get.

* * *

><p>A week later, Max and Rei's flights have been booked and saying goodbye to the blonde is harder than Kai expected it to be. He knows it's not forever, but it's easier to focus on that one than the one that's going to break him. Rei has his carry-on slung over his shoulder and Kai can't even look at him.<p>

The Chinese boy hasn't said a word all day that hasn't been in response to a question and Kai hasn't spoken to anyone period. Not that it mattered much because the younger ones talked more than enough to make up for it.

And then Max is gone and Takao's trying to pretend that he's not crying (even though he totally is) and that's even worse than him being an annoying loudmouth. Kai grits his teeth, shoves a thousand yen bill at him, and snarls for him to go and buy something sugary that'll inevitably piss him off later.

He expects Rei to go off with them and play babysitter like he usually does, but the Chinese boy doesn't move.

Kai can't look at him even when familiar fingers interlace with his.

"You printed out your boarding pass and everything?" Kai asks gruffly, and doesn't turn his head to see the answer.

The hand in his squeezes.

The line to get through security is long and winding, and Kai shoots off a text to Kenny once they get in line. For about fifteen minutes, neither of them says a word.

Suddenly, Rei stops, pale-faced and wide-eyed.

"I've got to get out of here," he says and without preamble ducks out of line and underneath the barricade. Startled and kind of confused, Kai follows him, catching the dirtiest of all dirty looks from one of the security guards. He glares back and approaches Rei, who's leaning up against the wall.

"What the hell?" Kai demands, "We were almost halfway through, what if you miss your flight, idiot?" He forgets, for that brief moment, that he'd been trying to avoid speaking to him.

Rei just smiles at him, shaky and almost scared.

"I can't do it," he begins, before amending, "Well, I can. I just… I don't want to."

Kai stops short.

"I hadn't been sure," he continues, "I've been thinking this whole time and it's… it's kind of scary. To think about it at all." Kai can drink to that. "It's not _just_ because of you, so you're totally not allowed to feel guilty about a thing. There's not even electricity in my village and after all this time, I don't feel like I'd be entirely comfortable living there again. It's so small and that's fine for the White Tigers, but I don't think I'm a White Tiger anymore. We're still family and all that, but somehow, I think I've grown away from them. I don't know if it's my place anymore. Even though it sounds kind of awful when I say it out loud." Rei's rambling now and Kai's about three seconds away from telling him to either get to the point or shut up. Whatever that point might be. "I mean… if your offer's still open, that is. If it is, can I still accept it?"

And the only reasonable thing Kai can do is reach out and yank him into a crushing hug even though Takao's just shown up again and is making kissy noises at them.

* * *

><p>It's been five hundred and sixty-eight nights, and Kai's never been happier or felt so stable.<p>

It's been five hundred and sixty-eight nights, and Rei's never felt so loved.

* * *

><p>AN: AND THERE YOU HAVE IT. Somehow, this fic felt like a monster to write. I don't know whether it was because I was working within the canon universe or what, but I'm relieved to have it finished. Please review if you enjoyed this, or even if you want to skewer me with a trident. I'm okay with either and I take both praise and criticism gracefully.<p> 


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